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©2016-2019

Ben Pechey

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SELF LOVE

September 13, 2019

 

Oh hello, darling and welcome back to Fashion Month on benpechey.com, today we are talking about the concept of self-love. In the fashion industry, this is a commodity that is often traded upon, used and sold. When in reality it is something that we have to produce for ourselves. 

 

I often think that self-love is often confused with narcissism and the idea of self-obsession. This is an easy mistake, but one that can quickly be cleared up. Showing yourself Self-love is just an act of confidence, the concept of accepting yourself for who and what you are. This is a joyous emotional state that many don’t reach. 

 

What is also worth ruminating upon is the fact that we are loving ourselves in a world that is positioned against us. If you are anything that deviates from the norm, a minority, or in reality anything that isn’t a cis-heterosexual white man, then you will face issues wherever you go.

 

 

 

 

 

It means that when it comes to my fashion choices whether they feel overt or controversial or not, to some they always will be. I slipped into this denim (for those in the know pronounced denime) jump-suit and instantly felt at home. As comfortable as pyjamas, but belted to give me support and definition. 

 

This to me is a bold autumn outfit that picks out many key trends for the season ahead, but overall makes me happy and fulfilled which is how dressing should make you feel. This outfit boosts my mood and increases my ability to provide self-love to myself. This outfit is a self-love rechargeable battery. Yet I know that walking through the streets of Yorkshire, this outfit will turn so many heads, quicker than I turn my ankle over in these heels!!

 

I always talk about different forms of activism, and the most simple and universal is the act of visibility. Being visible in this society is a form of defiance. To leave the house looking like I do, being honest is a risk. There will always be people that disapprove, hate or vocalise their specific issues with the way you look and the way you live your life. 

It happens wherever I go and is one of those micro-aggressions that I carry around at all times. 

 

 

 

 

 

To this, I have a simple antidote that makes me feel calmer and more capable of taking on my life day to day. I often talk about music when I babble on in some of my in my mind postsbut I find that music has the answers. 

 

I always tend to come back to tracks that made me feel a specific way. One that I oft ruminate on is a lyric from Q.U.E.E.N, by Janelle Monaé, which I found via watching the Chanel SS14 show (which is a major remix btw) : 

 

“Even if it makes others uncomfortable, I will love who I am” 

 

This is the sentiment that I will live by. This is self-fulfilling, and just like my denime jumpsuit, will push me into the world with all the confidence I have. I don’t care what others think, my self-love keeps me comfortable. 

 

 

 

 

 

I will continue to love myself for exactly who I am. I urge you to do the same! 

 

Thank you for joining me today, I will see you soon! 

 

 

 

Shot by Rachel Pechey

 

Shop my Lewk:

Jumpsuit: ASOS Curve

Tee: ASOS Curve

Heels: M&S
Bag: Zatchels

Earrings: ALDO via ASOS

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