Your Existence is Brilliant!

As an anxious human, I spend a lot of time locked in a duel of emotions. Constantly having to second-guess how I feel. One of the key beliefs my anxiety tries to foist on me is my overall uselessness. This is amplified by ADHD and executive dysfunction, on days when my brain simply refuses to cooperate.

I know this isn’t my fault.

I know I am not alone in feeling like this.

I know my worth is NOT tied to my productivity.

Yet the voice of my anxiety is there, whispering to me,telling me how lazy and worthless my contributions are.

Even now, I can feel it; I am shooting this content inside because I cannot walk in these heels. I forgot to steam these jeans. I can feel my brain telling me just how much I have phoned this in!

So what’s the point of all this? Well, a few weeks ago I gave blood.

It was a simple exercise that cost nothing, a little bit of my time maybe, but that is it. When I had given 470ml of blood, several people were extremely kind, grateful, and were so incredibly nice to me. Every time you give blood, you can help up to three people, and there is always such a demand. This means that the blood donation teams are incredibly grateful.

I was truly surprised by this level of gratitude.

I was walking on air for days after! I had done something good, that cost me nothing, required no energy, and helped others. We take what runs through our veins for granted, but it’s so important. It is silly, but giving blood showed me a neutrality towards worth. Getting up, existing, breathing, it's all worth something.

Being alive is a big deal.

How we live, and what we do, is all a bonus. So if, like me, you have a brain that is a little bitch, you can remind it that our existence is brilliant just as it is, no labour required!