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  • Writer's pictureBen Pechey

Your Gender Book

Today is the day - after much waiting - Your Gender Book is published by Jesica Kingsley in the UK. It has been a long wait - but like so many things, it is worth the wait.

This book sits in a space that has gone unfilled for a while. Young LGBTQIA+ people, allies, parents, and schools have been left without resources, help, validation, and education. This book is here to change this and start a chain of what I hope to be a positive change.

I wrote Your Gender Book based on four tenants;

- It is a life-saving resource for young people, that will show readers they/their friends are valid. Offering so much information and inspiration to 'help you be you’ now! I was left to deal with coming to terms with who I was on my own, I never want anyone else to go through this alone. We are seeing tragically high rates of suicide and mental health issues for young LGBTQIA+ people - this book will not solve it, but it will help.

- It can be read without parents - as all information is fully explained clearly - for children who don’t feel ready/comfortable/safe speaking to adults. This is especially important as the current government is seeking to change how information is shared with parents.

- Everyone deserves to be happy, and this book provides a framework to start this journey - offering support, and creating allyship in readers who are not LGBTQIA+. I want anyone who picks up this book to feel the joy of knowing themselves better

- Anyone can pick this book up and learn. It may be aimed at children - but all of the information is the information that I use in my training sessions with businesses - it is a universal resource. I urge anyone who is fresh to the world of LGBTQIA+ rights and issues to read this book.

I have also received so many positive reviews ahead of publication, that prove how well Your Gender Book will work for so many people;

“This book was so wholesome, that is the first word that comes to mind. Next would be insightful, I feel as though this is something that should be readily available to all libraries and schools as it is extremely informative especially for younger readers. We learn in a kind and nurturing way through the gentle and funny narration from the author about gender and self expression. We get to know more about how to communicate on the topic of gender not only to others but with ourselves. That it is ok not to know exactly who you are right now and we are forever changing, 'who you are now is perfect'."

“Ye gods, what wouldn't I have given to read this book when I was a teen.”

"I really liked that there was a balance of good and bad, no sugar coating whilst also making the reader know that there is hope, help and many many influential and successful people out there who have made it and we can too. There is so much happiness, information and resources in this, overall it's just a brilliant book that I feel like is needed and we need more non binary, trans and gender non conforming books like this! Highly recommend whether you are a member of this community yourself, questioning or a friend/ relative just looking to be an ally.”

“While geared towards a young-adult audience, this book would be helpful for anyone who has ever wondered about their gender or was unsure about themselves. This book was a wonderfully affirming and I enjoyed the comprehensiveness of this book. ”

“Thank you to Ben Pechey for writing this book! While it is definitely aimed at younger readers, I think that people of all ages, especially those who are not sure where to start on their journey, can find meaning and value in this book. It is lovely every step of the way, and provides a very conversational, caring, and supportive approach to exploration of gender, an extensive resource list, and fun games along the way! I think it would benefit kids everywhere for this to be as accessible to them as possible, and would provide such a strong way for parents to better understand their children. I highly recommend this book, and hope it becomes a massive success.”

“What an amazing book for young kids and adults everywhere.”

“I think this is a wonderful place to start. I have really struggled with finding a way to talk to my kids about gender, without relying on stereotypes to tell them what it isn’t. This book provides the best jumping off point and introduction to gender and LGBTQIA+. I’m excited to buy a copy for them to read!”

“Ben Pechey uses a chatty, straightforward style to explore all kinds of topics - some heavy, some not, all directed at giving the reader the tools, the confidence, to be themselves. No abracadabra revelations are promised. Instead, Pechey goes out of their way to emphasise that self-discovery and self-acceptance happen at whatever pace the reader determines. They also use quotes throughout the book from an impressive array of queer icons which are intended to inspire, reassure, and validate.”

It would mean the world to me if you bought the book and shared it with family, schools, and anyone who needs to read this book. Reviews sell books, so if you could leave one it will help future readers find this resource.

You write a book alone, but publishing a book takes a village. I would like to thank my agent Megan Carrol for helping me navigate the world of publishing. Andrew James for originally commissioning this book. Harry Taylor for marketing at JKP. As well as the team that worked on the book. Finally thanks to my mum for always being my beta reader and my editor helping me craft thousands of words into the book I hold now.

Shot by Ruth Pechey


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