The Lion the Witch and the sleep deprived Blogger…
Another powerful piece of journalistic flare awaits
Quite often when I cannot sleep my mind begins to ponder the things that worry me, and invariably prolongs my wakefulness. Recently -by recently I mean 23:53pm on Wednesday the 29th of August- one such fit of restlessness brought my mind to the content on my website, and what I was planning to write for September.
Now September has been dubbed the JANUARY OF FASHION (see 1:14 of this advert for The September Issue) and let's face it, I HAVE SHOT SOME LEWKS, but I was a little short in the words department. So, like any good blogger, I headed to Google Analytics. Far and away my most read post last month (read by more than just my mum; hello mum👋🏼👋🏼👋🏼) was the word jumble for my 200th post, where I rambled on and on about the things that were circling my head at the time.
I am a big believer in giving people what they want, so maybe I will make this type of post a monthly thing - READ I am still awake at 00:02am on Thursday the 30th of August and this is what I want to write. SO BUCKLE UP KIDS, here we are again.
Okay, let's start where we left off last time, MUSIC. I have been listening to A LOT of Cher. Mostly because of the Mama Mia buzz, and also because WHY NOT. I keep coming back to one song in particular, and that is (get ready, it's a good one) I walk alone: 7 Years of Life in 3 minutes.
Okay so firstly this song is a B-O-P, and is great to sing if you like me, cannot sing. You bust out those off-key choruses Carol, I believe in you.
Secondly, the video is literally HUNDREDS OF PICTURES CHARTING CHER’S ENTIRE LIFE. I use all caps there not because I am shouting at you, but because you really need to know about this video. Are you still reading this? GO AND WATCH THE VIDEO. Or keep reading to the end of the post and then GO AND WATCH THE VIDEO.
Talking of Cher; have you seen The Witches of Eastwick? I have talked in moderate length here about this film. I’m really saying this because it strengthens a website to internally link to other pages, oh and it’s a because its a great film, mostly because it’s Cher. I feel Cher would appreciate the personal promotion- so why not be honest. In other Cher films, I watched Moonstruck last night, Cher's oscar winning role. Its on Netfix right now, and I'm not sure how I feel about it; let me know your thoughts...
By the way its 00:20am- you can work out how quickly I write.
This month my phones autocorrect has gone into overdrive, I thought I would share some gems;
- Replacing merci beaucoup with MERCI Buttercups- because WHY NOT?
- Changing the word asleep to alstroemerias, a word that I cannot spell, but that I had to subsequently google- they are a flower known as the Peruvian Lilly.
- Embarrassing me by altering the word STANNING to STABBING - which was the opposite of what I meant, I'm so sorry Elizabeth...
Another question; have you heard the song ‘In these shoes’ by Kirsty MacColl? Another great song, very much of its time. I have a lot of respect for Kirsty, namely because she clearly is a fan of sex and footwear, and this is a nice surprise for my Mum, but Kirsty and I have a LOT in common.
Now whilst my Mum sits and thinks about that, I will give you the gist of this song - Kirsty is propositioned by three men, and they each would like to treat her to a GOOD T-I-M-E, the first two suggesting a faraway place for this activity, to which Kirsty replies ‘In these shoes? No way, Jose I said: Honey, let's stay right here’. The last wishes Kirsty to walk up and down his back, to which she replies “In these shoes?
I doubt you'd survive. I said: Honey, let's do it”.
If at this juncture you don’t feel that Kirsty is an icon of our times, then I’m not sure what will impress you, and for that, I am very sorry. However, sadly Kirsty is no longer with us - something tragic to do with a speedboat- thus I feel she deserves Icon status.
Another way to become iconic is to have your work featured in a great TV programme. Luckily Kirsty wins this round too. I am re-watching Sex and the City for the umpteenth time - a word which is an informal number and is used to emphasise how many times Ben has decided to re-watch a series instead of trying something new.
Okay back to Kirsty, Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte. The very song I have just declared my love for was the opener for season four in the episode The Agony and the Ex-tacy, and was a perfect song for a great episode.
I like SATC, yet this time around some of the episodes have left a bad taste in my mouth, Kirsty’s work excluded of course. Like many older series it can be forgiven for most things for its age, except the ignorance displayed by Ms. Bradshaw for Bisexuality in ‘Boy, Girl, Boy, Girl’. I cannot imagine the girls being so disrespectful today, and perhaps would be woke enough to expunge their wisdom on topics such as non-binary and trans people, much like I did a couple of weeks ago (a veritable spider's web of internal links). My opinion for the gals has also adjusted; Carrie seems more self-obsessed, Charlotte more unrealistic, Miranda more relatable and yet Samantha remains a god damn icon.
Update, I have just got to season 6 and ALL IS FORGIVEN. Oh also did you ever see the amazing video; Brands and the City? Well its a 10 minute video of all the brands mentioned in all of the episodes of sex and the city- EVERY LAST ONE. Created by artist Pierre Buttin, it is a really well made video and a great way to catch up with the 4 girls and their love of all things commerce.
Okay I have just re-read what I have so happily sat in bed typing (its 00.52am btw) and I think I have done a good job, and perhaps I might be able to sleep now, sometimes I don’t know when to stop. Talking of not knowing when to stop; did I ever tell you about the time I was asked to leave and was subsequently banned from a Royal Mail sorting Office? No? Maybe next time …
Thanks for reading and enjoying these posts, yes, even you Mum (its mainly the passion for shoes Kirsty and I have in common, mainly…) they are surprisingly cathartic to write, clearing my head in a way that only writing can, so thanks again for enjoying them so much kids!
Keep scrolling down to see the credits for this AMAZING FASHION LEWK I am serving you today. Tune in next week for another great post, but for now at 01:12am, I bid you Goodnight, now GO AND WATCH THE VIDEO.
Shot by Rachel Pechey
Shop My LEWK:
Coat: Topshop, Similar
Top: You’ve seen it so many times, do you really care anymore?
Trousers: New Look, Similar
Shoes: Underground, Similar Styles
Sunglasses: Karen Walker